Emotional eating, soothing excercise

While my morning rituals (wake up early, step on scale, go to the gym, eat at work) have been decimated over the past few months, I am slowly going through the destruction and picking up the pieces.  Stepping on the scale was one of those pieces I've been collecting the last week or two. But this morning I didn't even bother.

Last night I woke up with such extreme anxiety that after an hour of tossing and turning, I decided to get up and be productive.  I have never had problems sleeping - light, noise, environment - nothing bothers me.  After an hour and a half, I started eating, hoping the food in my stomach would numb the wedding-related terror.  (Lovely Lady and I are looking at venues this weekend, and I feel so unprepared!)

It was a food storm.  And this morning, I didn't step on the scale.

But this morning was the first morning that I went to the gym in a long time.  After my last post I realized that I need my morning routine back.  It was a glorious morning at the gym.  Normally I play fast music and try to keep up.  After last night, though, I wasn't prepared to sweat my heart out like that.  Instead, I played some soothing music and just went at my own pace.  It was just perfect - relaxing, endorphin-producing, moved my body, and got me out of bed.

Goals, goals, goals

I love living with my Lovely Lady, and I love being with her every second we're both free.  We have packed schedules and don't spend nearly as much time together as we would like.  And we have very different natural schedules.  The Lovely Lady is somewhat a perfectionist, and is willing to go to bed at 3 a.m. to get things done. I, on the other hand, like to be asleep by 10:30.  Sadly, we've been compromising by going to bed around 1:30.

My weight loss has been stagnant for awhile - even before the Lovely Lady and I were involved - not least of which is because I had already begun going to sleep much later.  Amazing Dane Findley (family friend, and productive guru extrordinaire) is doing a 4:15 Experiment - where he's going to wake up at 4:15 for 30 consecutive days in a row to increase his productivity.  The extremism of the experiment wouldn't work for me (4:30 every day!  Yowzers!) - I need much more flexibility in my life - but I'm tempted to try a similar change in my own life.  I used to be able to leave the house at 7 a.m. without much problem, and I would like to do that again sometime soon.

Committing to early mornings means that I need to spend less time with Kate, sadly.  For the past few months, that wasn't a decision I was willing to make.  As my life is getting crazier, though, I'm really missing the self-care time morning workouts allow me.

If it's not part of my routine, it doesn't get done, which is part of the reason I haven't made it to the gym very often these past few months.  I need to make weight loss, eating healthy, and the gym a priority, but that's so hard right now because I'm so in love....

You gotta move it, move it

Tonight is the first time this week that I’ve been home before 10 p.m., and this is not at all unusual. My professional and social obligations keep me out late at night, yet I almost always manage to wake up in time for the gym. Almost.

I work out in the morning to avoid possible scheduling conflicts. The later in the day it gets, the easier it is to simply not go to the gym. Opportunities, dates, work comes up, and I stay away from the elliptical machine.

Despite my 6:30 a.m. wake up time, I am not a morning person. My alarm is set a whole hour before I must roll out of bed so that the multiple times I hit the snooze don’t keep me from exercising.

Yet, I really do enjoy working out in the evening. I feel more energized after my work out, and more coherent during the day. I am considering changing my work out schedule, but I’m afraid that if I exercise during the evening it will become more of a suggestion and less of a routine.

I think that once I move from my apartment and blow all of my money on that project, I am going to sign myself up for dance classes. The problem – as always – is that I don’t know what type of classes I want to take. Salsa? Bhangra Indian dancing? Samba? Belly dancing? Hip hop? Ballroom? Swing? I love all forms of dance, and each one appeals to me in a unique way. I have been paralyzed by choice, just as I often am paralyzed by choice in the toothpaste aisle. I just need to go ahead and close my eyes and just dance.