Weekly Weigh-In (167.8)

This week’s weight: 169.4
This week's weight lost: -1.6
Total weight lost: -58.6


Wow!  What a huge loss for a week where I exercised only twice!  


It was a fairly good week.  The highlight of my week weight-loss wise was also the low point of my week personally.  I got in a huge argument with my best friend last week.  In my anger, I decided to go and treat myself somewhere nice and eat at restaurant I like.  The MUNI Metro was down, so I decided to walk to the restaurant - about 3 miles away.  As I walked, I realized that I was only going to eat the meal out of frustration, and as the miles went by I decided to instead make a responsible dinner at home.  

Weekly Weigh-In (169.4)

This week’s weight: 169.4
This week's weight lost: -.8
Total weight lost: -57.0

This week was not as hard as weeks before, but it was still a struggle.  And here I am - almost a pound lighter.  Go me!

I was thinking about "catching up" this morning.  I want to catch up to the goal I set for myself - 135 pounds by October 13.  But October 13 was picked randomly.  It was the day that would mark a pound loss per week from the starting goal of mid-January (when I got re-energized).  While reflecting on this, I realized that as long as I lose the weight by January 7, I'll be happy.  I don't want to do another year of this.  After doing the math - because I love math - I realized that achieving that goal would require an average of a 4 pound loss per month.  I  think beginning May, I will start to judge success more by my monthly number than my weekly number.

What is success?

How do you measure success?  Do you compare yourself to who you were last decade?  Last year?  Last month? 

A decade ago I didn't know how to eat.  I didn't understand the symbiotic relationship between my body and my mind and engaged in very unhealthy eating practices.

A year ago (and some change) I was the heaviest I've ever been, 226.4 pounds.  I felt shameful that I was so huge, and so I started this journey.


A month ago my weight loss was again slowing down, but I was less than half a pound away from 165 pounds.

Most of weight loss is mental.  Eat less and exercise more is easy in theory, but you have to inspire yourself to not eat that delicious cookie and get to the gym in the morning.  This is a journey without specific beginnings and endings, so measuring your own success is sometimes hard.  Success breeds more success. 

Today I have lost over 55 pounds since my heaviest weight, and I am almost 5 pounds heavier than I was last month.  I have two options - considering myself a failure for not meeting my pound a week challenge so far this year and gaining 5 pounds, or a success for losing so much weight and having just 35 more pounds until my goal weight. 

I'm going to call it a success, and inspire myself to lose 1.5 pounds a week to get back on track.

Post-Passover

Monday’s weigh in: 170.2
Total loss: 56.2

I’m back a little curvier, but I’m here!  Passover was stressful – personally (family) and professionally (professional Jew), but it was also lovely.  Passover is a holiday celebrating the Israelite Exodus from Egypt, and is an opportunity for the (inter) faith community to come together and celebrate the need for freedom for all.  I very much love my job, and I love the idea of freedom for all.  It’s such a wonderful holiday, even if it does involve some bland non-rising matzah.

For the past few months I have been unmotivated to lose weight.  While I haven’t gained back my motivation, I do know what I can do to get myself back on track.

1. I cannot dislike my fat away.  I hate how corny it sounds, but I have to like and honor my body and what it can do for me to lose the weight.  When I’m disgruntled, I care less about the wellbeing of my body and will often eat in frustration.  My body is a temple, and I need to care for it so.
   
2. Track calories is a must.   If it goes in my mouth, I need to record it.  Tracking is an automatic form of accountability, and it keeps me aware of how much I’m putting in my mouth.
   
3. I cannot skip the morning routine.  I’ve been staying up late for a variety of reasons, but I like my weight loss program and myself a lot more if I get myself to the gym before work.

I didn’t go to the gym this morning, but I did yesterday and I will tomorrow (and hopefully the rest of the week!).  I ate within my caloric goals yesterday and even hit every nutritional goal in the process!  I made myself quinoa with chicken Sunday for lunch for the week, and have been supplementing it with some frozen deliciousness in my work freezer (Morningstar Chick Patties, Trader Joe’s frozen rice with melted cheddar, frozen veggies, and fresh carrots).

In other news, this is my 100th post.  Go me!