Healthy eating simply feels better now than it ever did before. My body works better after a year of exercise and 40 pound loss. I feel healthier and happier, and I now am confident that I can create my own path and physique. I can care and sculpt my body like I would feed and trim a plant. A simple concept, but until this year, it was completely foreign to me.
In 2009 I started at 215 pounds, size 21, and unhappy with my body. Now in 2010 I am starting at 175 pounds, size 14, and excited about my body.
I am looking forward to the next year, but I still feel ambivalent about my 2010 goals. My goal weight (arbitrarily set) is 135 pounds, which is 40 pounds away from what I am at currently. Part of me feels like I now have more tools than I ever had before, and I should be able to get rid of 40 pounds within six months. The other part of me remembers than it just took me a year to shed 40 pounds, and I’m afraid that weight loss will become slower the closer I am to my goal weight. To be completely truthful, I am afraid that I won’t know how to eat at 135 pounds; I have to imagine losing weight at 145 is a lot different than losing it at 215.
Ultimately I know what my goals are, but I don’t know how quick I can achieve them.
My 2010 goals are:
- Lose 40 pounds and be at my goal weight of 135. (I am most anxious about the next 20 pounds, which will put me at a “healthy” BMI weight)
- Squeeze into a size 8. I would like to be able to be a size 6, but we’ll see how my body works looks and feels.
- Take a dance class.
- Set a fitness-related goal. (Maybe train to run a 5K?)
- Learn how to improve my healthy cooking. I know some recipes, and I would love to learn more and new ones.
- Feel pretty. I love that clothing options are opening up to me, and I want to explore and take risks with my clothes. (Also, I am pretty!)
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